Waiting on Baby, dVerse Haibun #29

I wake up slowly and the first thing that pops into my head is that I’m not only still pregnant, but I’ve seemingly grown larger overnight. As I try to extricate myself from the waterbed so I can go to the restroom, I find myself wailing, “I’m as big as a house and still no baby? Ugh! I’m so tired of being pregnant!”  My husband of two years reaches over to kiss me and automatically makes the same reply he’s been making every morning, “You’re not that big and eventually this baby will come…when he’s good and ready.”  He’s heard the same litany for weeks now and is inured to compassion or sympathy. He’s just as tired as I am of my final weeks of pregnancy. 

These weeks haven’t been easy on anyone. I try to be sensitive to his feelings, truly I do. It aggravates me to no end that I must rely on him to put on my socks and shoes, help me sit and get up again, and dang it, get out of bed!  I’m stuck between the water mattress and the side of the bed. “Honey, I hate to bother you, but can you help me out here?  I can’t get out of the bed.”  He looks over at me, sighs, and rises out of bed like a gazelle or something. He comes over to my side of the bed and starts laughing. I guess the sight of a whale-sized woman stuck in a waterbed is funny, but instead of laughing, I start bawling. “I’m going to be pregnant forever! I’m as big as a whale and keep getting bigger. I’m so tired of waiting! Why can’t this baby decide it’s time to be born?”  My husband stops laughing and leans down to envelope me in his arms. “Babe, you’re not going to be pregnant forever. You will deliver this baby soon I’m sure. Maybe even today! Here, let me help you up, ok?”  As I putter over to the restroom after I’m free of the cursed waterbed, I pat my overly large abdomen and whisper to my baby, “Ok baby, we’re ready for you, anytime to make your appearance. No pressure, but can we do it today? I can’t wait to see you!”

Winter arms are long.

Icy fingers hold too tight.

Trees start blooming, free and bright.
D. Elaine Wood-Lane

1/26/17


This week’s haibun prompt from https://dversepoets.com/2017/01/23/haibun-monday-29/ was to write about waiting. I’ve waited thousands of times over the years, but I can recall no impatience and discomfort more intense than waiting for my first child to arrive. Said child, a son, will be 33 in May, but I can recall instantly those final weeks of pregnancy and my frustration every morning at having to wait for him to be born. 

Try your hand at writing a haibun!  They are a fun challenge to mind and form.  I hope you’ve enjoyed this peek into my worst “waiting” story ever. For more information and to take up the challenge, go to https://dversepoets.com/2017/01/23/haibun-monday-29/ for more information. 

Haibun Monday: A Little Romance

I missed one day of work due to my little sons catching a bug at school and when I came back to work, I felt like I had mistakenly walked onto the set of the old Dating Game show. Just one day! I learned that three graduate students had been sent over to our clinic (the day I was out) to be interviewed for a semester long internship and I would be supervising the intern. I was given three resumes and application letters to review quickly. Every nurse, doctor and staff member mentioned the three intern candidates and which one they thought I should pick as I walked through the Dermatology Clinic where I worked as a Clinic Coordinator. I took the three applications back to my boss, Carol, and asked who she thought was the best. That’s when I learned she had already chosen an intern and he would be starting later the same morning! “Oh, and, umm, Elaine, he’s very handsome. I think you’ll really like him! Wink, wink, nudge, nudge. You should start dating!” I shook my head in frustration. “Carol! This guy is supposed to be here to learn and to help us! He’s not coming here to be set up with an over the hill divorcee with two little boys!” She just laughed and left.

Later that morning a tall, dark and handsome man walked up to my desk and introduced himself as my new intern. Dammit, he even smelled handsome! Carol just laughed at my mumbling, turned beet red after I glared at her and left us to it. I was pretty icy with him for the first couple of months. Then I thawed out to merely tepidly friendly. I didn’t want him to get any wild ideas while I was overseeing his masters project and thesis. At the end of the semester I proofread his paper and retyped it for him. Then he started asking me out to dinner to repay me for helping him so much. I kept saying no. Finally, one day he caught me overwhelmed with patients and I said yes without meaning to do so. I was sunk and he knew it. He laughed heartily and left before I could change my answer. We dated for 14 months and then I regained my sanity and broke up with him. He was too young, crazy and different for our romance to last, but our summer-spring romance ended pleasantly.

Spring and summer meet.
Flowers bloom, birds sing sweetly.
Chilly fall kills blooms.

D. Elaine Wood-Lane
8/8/16

Today at dVerse, the challenge was to write a brief, true romance story in one or two paragraphs followed by a concise haiku to describe the same story. This is my attempt. Yes, it is true. No, it is not the story of my romance with my husband. He’s a very private guy!  Go to: https://dversepoets.com/2016/08/08/haibun-monday-a-little-romance/ to read more haibuns or to leave your own!  

Shuu rin – Autumn Rain (A Haibun for dVerse)

Driving to work in the heavy autumn rains, it felt like the sun had escaped our view forever. Where the sun shines 330 days a year, when the clouds come and darken our world, we freak out a bit and depression and edginess spreads over the town like the plague. Nonetheless, after a soggy, cool weekend, I had dropped my boys off at school and was headed to work at the Dermatology Clinic at the Medical School. I got halfway there, talking and begging my old white Audi, Blanche, to hang in there until I made it to work. Suddenly she sputtered and coughed. I patted the dashboard lovingly, speaking gently and encouragingly to her. That’s when all the lights flashed on my dashboard and I felt Blanche die and start floating in the rushing river of water that Brownfield highway had somehow become. Yikes! I was really floating! Just like those people on the news in other places! I willed Blanche to coast right, twisting her steering wheel hard to the right, hoping it would help. I felt her tires hit pavement and steered even harder. She stopped, right in the middle of the busiest traffic in town. I was stuck in the middle lane of a three lane highway and cars were whizzing by like SST’s. What was I going to do? Suddenly a huge truck pulled up and stopped in front of me while simultaneously its emergency flashers started blinking. A huge, young cowboy climbed out of the truck and made his way back to me. I opened my door to talk to him. “Ma’am, has she died completely? I’ll pull her over to the side if you’d like me to do so. My truck can take her easily.” As I looked into the man’s deep blue eyes, I had an inappropriate thought that he could take me easily too. I didn’t say that out loud, though, thank goodness! I didn’t want to be a stereotypical divorcee, embarrassingly lonely and obvious. “If you could do that, I’d really appreciate it! I’m afraid I’m going to cause a stack up if I don’t pull her over. What do I need to do?” “Not a thing! Just sit tight and I’ll hook her up! Then when I signal, put her in neutral and guide her to the parking lot over there.” Sitting in the car and being pulled over to the side, I had to smile. West Texans might be a lot of things, but unhelpful they were not. As my car coasted into the parking lot and I put her in park, the young man jumped out of his truck and came back, leaned in over the open door. “Do you need a ride to work? I’m headed over to the main campus.” My day, even in the heavy fall rain, suddenly had sunlight.

Heavy, bruising rain,
Ice cold and relentlessly dull,
Making new rivers.

© D. Elaine Wood-Lane
6/21/16

The Haibun prompt from dVerse Poets (https://dversepoets.com) was to use one of the Japanese words for rain as the title and to describe the type of rain being written about. A Haibun consists of a non-fiction paragraph followed by a haiku to summarize and deconstruct the main point of the prose paragraph. This is my offering today as a memory came to me of a heavy rainy day when a kind stranger towed my car to the side of the road.

https://dversepoets.com/2016/06/20/haibun-monday-50-shades-of-rain/